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How to Stop Self Sabotaging Your Success - Five Steps



I am a master goal setter. I can tell you all the different ways I want to improve, change, grow and achieve. However...I'm not the best completer.

When I'm starting to lose weight, I compulsively eat. When I start getting further in my couch25K app then I have ever before, I stop. When I do these things I tell myself it's because I've been so good. I tell myself I deserve a break. A break turns into a week. Before I know it it's new years eve and I'm making a new Pinterest board with my hopes and dreams of who I'll be in the upcoming year.

If I were honest with myself (and believe me I'm starting to try) I would admit that I give up on these things because deep down I don't see myself as anything but a fat slob. I'm no athlete. I'm a soft, round, Netflix and Chill, down another Pepsi Max kind of girl.

What this boils down to is: I don't achieve things. I always quit. I'm a failure.

This may seem extreme, but your core beliefs always are.

Why does this matter? Well, your core beliefs dictate everything you do. Who you associate with, what you wear, where you live, what you eat. It's your everything. So when your everything is that you're fat, or dumb, or not good at this or that - then that's all you'll ever be. As humans we don't like to be wrong and to break out of the roles we have dictated for ourselves, or allowed others to dictate for us, would prove us wrong on a fundamental level.



So - what do you do about it?

I'm not a psychologist, but I did see an amazing one that allowed me to start questioning the many core beliefs I felt about myself and my world. This, combined with some Tony Robbins coaching  and armed with a Kikki K Habits Journal, I started on a mission:

Step 1: Identify who I wanted to be
Step 2: Identify the core beliefs I had now (no matter how nasty they were)
Step 3: Identify the habits I had that kept me at step 2
Step 4: Identify what triggers I had that kept me repeating these mistakes
Step 5: Identify the habits I needed to have to become the person in step 1

That's it. Five steps to overcoming your self sabotage. Oh, and one little side step - go easy on yourself. You're going to fall off the wagon, you're going to go back to your ex, stop training, eat a whole pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream in one sitting etc. You're going to do this because you're human. Allow yourself to be human.

The key is to dust yourself off Captain Marvel style and keep going. Every day you'll get a little bit further.

Every two months I try to introduce a new habit to my bag of tricks. I'd love to hear your new habits to get you from the you that you are to the you you've always dreamed of being.

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