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What Does it Feel Like to Have Anxiety



Anxiety is a weird state to explain to someone that has never experienced it. I recently had a friend over and we were discussing the worst year of their life. Their anxiety completely took over their life and prevented them from doing even the most basic of tasks.

I nodded as I've also had my fair share of anxiety, although my diagnosis was that it was low. So while my anxiety isn't crippling, when it takes hold it's hard to break free.

Anxiety flare ups


I call them anxiety flare ups because that's what it feels like to me. Like my mind starts spinning gears and before I know it my heart is pounding and my stomach is in knots.

While depression is regret of the past, anxiety is a fear of the future. It's worrying about the unknown and the outcomes of our actions. For me, my anxiety strikes at night. When I wake up at 2am and lie there trying to count backwards from 300 to fall asleep. It's in this moment that my anxiety reminds me that I don't have a huge circle of friends so if I lost people I would eventually end up completely alone. Writing this out is a little embarrassing because when you're not in the midst of your anxiety the things you worried about seem so silly. When you're in it though, it's like you're finally seeing things clearly. You're able to see the subtle points of life and how they all spell out your doom.

What to do when you feel anxious


Everyone has different ways to deal with their anxiety and I think it all really comes down to what triggered your anxiety. What is it that you're anxious about?

Ending up alone: remind yourself of all the amazing people you have in your life. Having a gratitude journal and reflecting on all the good times you've had really helps me when I have this fear.

The fear of failure: remind yourself of all the times you have succeeded. Did you pass probation at work? Did you graduate high school? Did you host a great get together? Surely there is a time when you focused and nailed it. If you can do it once, surely you can do it again.

The fear of letting people down: remind yourself of all the instances where you weren't able to live up to expectation...and how the world kept on turning. How your world didn't collapse and the fact that even those that were disappointed managed to move on. You're not always going to be able to please everyone - that's life.

The fear of sounding stupid: remind yourself about all the times you've gotten it oh so right. The time someone asked a question and you knew the answer.  The time that something clicked for you faster than those around you. And, let's not forget that the opinion of others shouldn't shape your opinion of yourself. If you dull your light or don't pursue something because you fear people will see you as foolish then you're not living your life for yourself.

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